Hello again! So far, I have shared some research and some action ideas on meditation, approach/avoidance motivation, finding purpose, and spending time in nature. I hope you have found so far that there are some simple things you can do that can significantly help your well-being during this incredibly stressful time in which we are living.
I don't know about you, but I struggle with a rather simple paradox: I want to improve my mood and be at my emotional, physical, and mental best, now and always. But I also find that sometimes these scientifically supported interventions for well-being seem selfish during the chaos we are living in right now.
There are people right now who are hungry, who are uncertain about their employment or finances, or are living in abusive situations (especially true when we are staying home much more than usual). Maybe you are one of those people. If so, please know you are not alone, and can reach out for help. There are many resources available. Message me and I can provide links to resources in your area.
Maybe you are thinking these interventions that I am suggesting are nice, but you have bills to pay and a future to think about, including your health and safety, and the health and safety of your family members. Well, yes, I think I understand that. I cannot say I completely understand it, because some of this I have not lived myself. I can say I have definitely had times in my life where I worried about how I was going to pay the rent or feed my family. I have never had to worry about safety, certainly not the way people of color have had to worry. So, yes, maybe these interventions seem trite, but they are for EVERYONE. Regardless of circumstance, being at your best is important. Taking care of your mental and emotional health improves your physical health, thus allowing you to work, to problem solve, to take care of others better. These three areas of health are interconnected: each impacts the others. So, if you are worrying about your job or career, worrying about finances, worrying about what will, or will not, happen with the Black Lives Matter movement (and in general, the lives of black people everywhere), worrying about the pandemic.... well, I am here to tell you that in order to fulfill your purpose, whatever it is, you MUST pay attention to your mental and emotional health. This is a scientific fact.
So, today's topic: re-framing your thoughts. This ties into the previous days blogs, and I hope to make that connection clear before the end of today's post. First, what do I mean by re-framing your thoughts? Well, science has shown that the way we think and talk about a situation impacts our attitude and our behaviors. Simple example: When my husband and I first met, we lived a distance from each other, and we often missed each other. We agreed that our thoughts and words matter, so instead of saying "I can't wait to see you again", we chose to say "I am looking forward to seeing you again." Subtle difference, but the former implies difficulty, urgency, and generally a negative tone. The latter, the 'looking forward' thought, implies excitement, and provides hope for something in the future.
We can use this simple strategy, re-framing our thoughts/words, to our advantage during this stressful and chaotic times. For instance, instead of "I have to wear a mask" or "I have to stay home" because of the pandemic, you can change your thinking/words to this: "I am choosing to wear a mask to protect myself, and to protect others. This helps others.", and "I will continue to stay home as much as possible, because I want to protect myself, and my neighbors, and my community."
I have a neighbor who is so incredibly diligent about wearing a mask when he leaves the house, I have not seen him without it, even if he is just stepping out to go to his car. He is older, and probably qualifies as high risk for the COVID-19 virus. There have been times when it has been super hot and humid outside, and I have been tempted to go out without my mask on, and I have justified my temptation by saying "I am just going around the block, I won't see anyone." And then I think of my neighbor. And I wonder if I might see him out on my walk. And then I mask up. Out of respect for him! I don't want him to worry unnecessarily, when all I have to do is put on the mask and sweat a little bit more. It protects me, too, anyway! :)
Back to re-framing. Practicing this idea of re-framing is incredibly powerful, according to research. When done well, by re-framing to a more positive tone, we give ourselves power, and in the instance of my first example with my husband, it gives us hope. By removing the have to and the should haves from our vocabulary and our thoughts, we give ourselves freedom to CHOOSE to behave in particular ways.
I promised to tie today's post into the previous posts. So, research has shown that spending time in nature, meditating, and practicing approach motivation all contribute to a more positive outlook, better memory, and more creative thinking and problem solving. Exposure to nature and time meditating also improves our focus, which helps us narrow our attention to our purpose, focus on approach motivation, and become more aware of our thoughts and words. So, if you want to work on re-framing, spending time in nature and meditating will help. Activating your approach motivation will help focus your energy toward, not away, from your purpose, and all of these will make re-framing your thoughts even easier.
So, get outside. Meditate. Focus energy on your purpose, focus your energy on approaching that purpose (or multiple purposes). Re-frame your words and thoughts in a positive tone, to help approaching purpose, attitude, your sense of power, and feelings of hope.
You've got this!
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