Good morning! Yesterday, I talked about the value of getting out into nature, and I hope you took it to heart and connected with it somehow! I just got back from a morning walk in my neighborhood, and I focused on the beauty of the trees, and the sounds of the river and the birds, and the fresh air (even though it is SUPER hot and humid already!). I also talked out loud to myself, about what I was going to blog about today, but that is another story for another day. :)
Today, I am going to talk about meaning, or purpose. Why? Because I imagine you, like I, have been shouting in frustration, or languishing in sorrow, with the question: "What does this all mean?" Well, whether you are talking about the pandemic, the economic crisis because of the pandemic, or the civil unrest following the brutal murder of George Floyd (and many others), it is hard to find meaning in any of it. But, on the other hand, researchers in Positive Psychology have found that finding meaning, or purpose, in your life, and pursuing it is one of the great contributors to our own sense of happiness, contentment, and well-being.
So, meaning. Purpose. What is it? Well the 'it' is different for all of us, for certain. In Japanese, the phrase 'ikigai' refers to the reason you wake up in the morning, and is found to contribute to living long and living well. So, why do you get up in the morning? What is it that motivates you to push through the tough moments or days? Meaning research also tells us that your purpose can change over time. I have 4 kids, all grown now, but when they were little, one of my major purposes was being a great mom/cook/craft maker/bedtime storyteller. Now that they are all grown, and live all over the country, if I still focused my daily and hourly energy on being a good mom, well, it would be tough to find satisfaction in that, because they don't need me that much anymore! So, being open to changing purpose is important, whether it is children that grow up, relationships that end, or dreams that fall apart for some reason... being open to changing your purpose is important for your own well-being. Now, I still want to be a good mom, but my purpose is focused on sharing the findings from good research in Positive Psychology with others- being change in the world in whatever way I can. Which is why we are here on this blog today!
Okay, so purpose is important. Knowing what your purpose is, and knowing it can change is important. Knowing that purpose is not necessarily one big thing, but maybe several things, well, that's important, too.
What is your purpose today? Do you know what it is? Young people are likely to be searching for their purpose, or preparing for their purpose (by going to college or technical school, for instance). Older people may be searching, too, which is good! Actually meeting the finish line of your purpose is not what brings us joy, it is the process of searching for it, and then preparing for it, and the journey towards fulfillment that is the most meaningful part!
Back to my question: What is your purpose today? If you are struggling in this mess we find ourselves in today (pandemic, economic disaster, civil unrest), think about how you can find your purpose in all of it. Maybe your purpose is finding food for your family for today or this week. Maybe your purpose is finding work, or getting someone to answer at the unemployment office (good luck). Maybe your purpose is figuring out what you are going to do if or when your kids go back to school/participate in remote learning. Maybe your purpose is protesting for #BLM (be careful, wear a mask!). Maybe your purpose is learning about #BLM, or figuring out how you can contribute to making sure black lives really do matter in your community. Maybe your purpose is different than all that. Regardless, it is important to spend time to figure out what your purpose is, which might include figuring out how to move from what it ONCE was, to what is will be now.
Your purpose might be a bunch of little things, or it might be one big thing. No matter. As long as it is important to YOU, it doesn't matter how the world sees it, or how your family or friends see it. It must be important to YOU. Think about it. Maybe while you are out for a walk today, you have an out loud conversation with yourself about what gets you out of bed in the morning, and what will get you out of bed tomorrow, the next day, the day after that....you get the idea.
I am going to task you today with a mission. I want you to take a few minutes, whatever you have, and walk/sit outside if you can. In the stillness, think about your 'ikigai'. What excites you, what keeps you up at night, what motivates you to push through the tough times? Think about your ikigai and how you can put it into action right now, in these tough times.
My ikigai, on a big scale, is teaching others how to live their best life, and one way I live that ikigai is by cultivating those lessons in my own life. I spend time in nature, and I continue to learn and research Positive Psychology, I share it with my friends and family and students. I am adding an ikigai next week: I am getting that puppy! Research tells us that pets, especially dogs, alleviate loneliness and depressive symptoms, improve mood (increasing joy!), and give us a sense of connection. We'll talk about that another day......
Take care!
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